Now this fool is a man with a plan...and a book...and a chair...and a "cup" holder to stash his "stash" in. I don't even want to know what treasures he has in in there.
After speaking to our local authorities, I am pretty sure that my particular perps. are a local punk gang called The Juggalos. P.S. if you want to be taken seriously as a 'gang' you may want to come up with a cooler name than that. I'm just sayin'. If you are not familiar with these punks, then feel free to google them. They are a sad bunch of spoiled brats who paint their faces like poor pathetic clowns and they follow the music group Insane Clown Posse. Basically they are a bunch of brats who don't feel like they get enough attention at home, so they run away and join the circus, they're so called new family. These kids aren't dummies, but they are too stupid to realize that they are pawns in someone else's game. They are brainwashed into stealing from their blood family, breaking and entering strangers homes and selling drugs to support their new family. As I said, they are pawns, but they are too caught up in the excitement and romanticism of gang life that they don't even realize that they are selling their souls.
Pathetic...yes. But a very real pathetic group, probably in your backyard too. Be smart, people...keep your house locked up like Fort Knox. Otherwise it is an open invitation to punks like these to come in and have their pick of all the things you work so hard for.
Yet another group of people in society that have the same mentality of 'you go out and get a job, but give me everything you earn', simply because they want it. They don't need a job...that's what we're for...
]]>Now...granted, this is not an exact science. Just observations I make of those desperately sad, shallow souls that I come across in my daily life. Some on a more regular basis than others. Some people speak the truth, I write it. Brutal...yes. Worth it? Hell yes.
]]>Now this fool is a man with a plan...and a book...and a chair...and a "cup" holder to stash his "stash" in. I don't even want to know what treasures he has in in there.
Whelp, such is life in the real world, I know...but what if it didn't have to be that way? What if we all banded together and voted all of the jackasses off the island? I vote yes! Let's all make a pact right now, ok? Say it with me now...
"I (your name here) do solemnly pinky swear to never, never, ever promote, turn a blind eye or tolerate the bonehead, jackass, lazy know-nothing, off putting, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit that they are!"
Hallelujah! Holy shit! and Thank you Clark Griswold!
Goodnight Gracie!
]]>At the end of the movie Edward gives Bella the ultimatum that if she wanted him to be the one to transform her into a vampire in order to live for all of eternity together with him, then she would have to marry him first. Then...the screen fades to black...and then I said, "YES!" And everyone laughed...
Man...I have really turned into a sappy hopeless romantic these days. In the last 3 days I have watched Twilight, New Moon and The Notebook. Not to mention that in the last month or two I have read all four of the Twilight saga books, twice, and now I am re-reading some of my Jane Austen favs like Sense and Sensibility and Pride and Prejudice. What happened to the icy cold exterior that has been protecting and surrounding my heart for the last 30 something years - ...I mean 20 something...ya, ya, that's it...20 something?? Could it be that the frozen form that holds the place where my heart should sit is melting, and perhaps like the Grinch, my heart will grow two sizes in one day.
Let us ponder that for a moment...hmmm...NOPE!. Most likely I'm just in some sick and twisted romance phase and I will be back to my old cynical self in no time flat.
Although...if the world had more Edward Cullens in it chicks like me wouldn't be so cynical. I am right, no??
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Try as we did, we simply were not successful in ditching the kids at the pumpkin patch. We did however, come back with a whole hoard to decorate for Halloween and to get ready for the twins' birthday party. This pumpkin patch was huge and there was hardly anyone there this particular day. My guess is, is that was because it may hay have been the end of October, but it was ridiculously HOT that day. I'm no expert on weather related matters, but I'm nearly certain that it may have been 150 degrees out. Either that or the earth may have moved just a little closer to the sun that day and one of the tremendous sun flares licked out over California. Yes...I'm not a scientist, but I'm pretty sure that was it. Believable, no?
Here is the whole gang of motley little rugrats. Cute aren't they? Well...some of them are...they know who they are...LOL I love how Mason looks like we forced him to come with us under penalty of losing the right to build with his Lego collection - which if you are 9, is completely torturous.
After torturing the kids to pose on their pumpkins of choice, we went and and acted completely immature near the hay maze. A hay maze is just like a corn maze...only much shorter. In case you didn't know...The great thing about a good hay maze...you can lock the kids, they get lost for about an hour but there is as look out tower so the parents can go up make sure everyone ok, and that no one will CPS on you for ditching your kids in the hay maze...
Oh...Dear GOD...I think I just figured out what this big pumpkin is. I didn't realize it at the time, but...I think...is it possible...that it...is...Jack Sprat?? If it is...that would make me his FAT wife who could eat no lean...CRAP! I totally set myself up on that one, LOL One of my favorite sayings is, "I might be stupid...but I'm no dummy." I think I need to seriously reconsider that truthfulness of that saying now...
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We parked on one end of Main Street and walked down to the other side, sight seeing and window shopping and doing a little actual shopping too. The shops there are unique and reasonably priced.
I took this picture of Mason, Lexie and Zander in front of this totally adorable little house right on Main St.
Don't they appear to be completely angelic and sweet? Deceptive isn't it? Of course this was the start of our trip, so they weren't all hopped up on the candy and soda their Aunt spoiled them with. Who would do that? What kind of sick masochistic person would supply these sweet darling children with sugary sweets and set them loose on this quaint sleepy little town? Me of course.
All of the houses here look like this one in the back ground. You can't take a bad picture here. The flowers around this town are pretty spectular too.
Isn't Zander just so darn cute?? See what I mean about the flowers? They are spectacular and vibrant all through the town.
Look...it's 5 butts and 1 ass! If you know my family personally, you know why that's funny. I crack myself up sometimes...
I TOTALLY want this sign! It would match so well with the anti-welcome mat that I have on my front porch that reads: 'LEAVE'. I love it!! And, doesn't my nephew Allen do a bang up job of modeling it for us? P.S. Stephanie was his mom and since he wasn't 21 yet...I made sure to have a glass of wine for him too...I'm just that caring of a person. If you look close you will the sign I am contemplating getting for my Step Monster. How much do you think I could tick her off by placing that sign in her driveway??
Ah...yes...Sweet and Delicious Melons. Yes, they are sweet, they are real and they are spectacular! I love that quote...it never gets old...
This is where we ended our trip in Sutter Creek. We toasted a few glasses to my sister and then made our sauced way back down to Sacramento.
We ended up stopping at an old mine shaft and we took the kids panning for gold. There was an old scary looking gold miner there that looked very creepy in a Scooby Doo caper kind of way. He was definitely creep-tastic!
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As you may or may not be aware, I have been spending much of my time writing a manuscript for a book. I'm really happy with how it has turned out so far. I have had a few people read it and proof it for me, and they are biting for the next installment. So...we'll see where that goes. For now, I do so solemnly swear to keep up my blog at least once a week (ish) if not every few days like before. But...I'm on chapter 3 of the book and my goal is to be finished by my birthday - which is March 31...so do the math on how many shopping days you have left.
Ok...so here goes a few postings on what we have been up to the last couple of months. Are you ready?? You did ask for it you know...so only have yourselves to blame for the coming onslaught.
]]>For now, I am doomed to only blogging temporarily and sporatically at my madres house, until my power can be either repaired or replaced. If you knew the noise level over hear, you would understand why the blogs will be brief until I get my chord back.
Also...I have spent quite a bit of my free time trying my hand at writing a manuscript. If I like how it turns out then I might try to see if I can possibly get it published. I'm about forty pages into it so far with only a few hundred to go. I may post the first chapter once I get into it a little further, who knows...
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I am going to do you a favor and be very honest with you (P.S. nothing good can possibly come from a letter starting with this sentence...)
Yes you are being lazy and showing a lack of back bone. You have no drive, you're not assertive or have a goal or even a remote idea of how to get one. To be honest those are not qualities I want in a partner. Because they don’t make up a partner, they make up someone who is less than 50% of a relationship, someone who takes on less than 50% of responsibilities and doesn’t do whatever it takes to make things happen for themselves or their family. I let it slide that you live with your parents at 36, but in reality it was a red flag at your lack of initiative and independence.
I wanted to have this talk in person, but to be honest I just am not looking forward to seeing you again right now. I let you know from the beginning what qualities I look for in a man and you really have yet to show them. You are living the life of a high school student on summer break right now. I just cannot respect that. I come from the opposite end of working so hard for everything I have and not relying on anyone for a free pass. Just because you pay your mom and dad 500 a month, doesn’t mean it’s not still a free pass. I am just attracted to men who are more masculine and less in touch with their sensitive side. It’s not that you are too nice…I know you tell yourself that, but that’s not it at all. Yes, you are nice…but you need to couple that with manning up or growing a set of balls or whatever phrase you want to call it. When I asked you why you still talk with your ex wife, you said, “Cuz I’m too nice.” No…cuz you’re not man enough to say anything. There’s a difference. If you don’t want to be involved with your ex, then grow a back bone and do something about it. I have always been the person in the relationship that has had to be the responsible one and I am looking for someone to share that with me, not someone who needs constant guidance and a relationship mentor. You are too old to need someone to teach you how to be a good boyfriend. Yes flowers are nice, but they are not everything. You know what’s nice? Helping a woman with her suit case up and down four flights of stairs, or helping her hoist it into the trunk and not watching her struggle with it. That’s nice. Or, how about asking questions about the other person’s life and not dominating conversations about YOU…you’re favorite subject. I have never met anyone who continually tries to sell themselves to me by telling me how smart they are, how funny they are, how good they are in bed or how good they are at everything…and you’re not. I think that you think you are adding to conversations by relating something, but most of the time you don’t, you turn the conversations around and make them about you. Well, people don’t always want to talk about you. You’re life isn’t very interesting which is why, I assume, you presume to be an expert on all subject matters, like highly recommending a place of travel that you have never actually been to yourself. Who does that? Or telling people you are IN a band and in actuality you have had a hand full of lessons and couldn’t even play a song all the way through or even hit all of the right notes. Perhaps you are working towards being in a band…but you are not currently in one now. I attest all of that to your insecurity.
Apologizing for bad behavior doesn’t make up for it, actions do. So far you have been all promises and words and no actions. If you want to know why your exes go for other men, even if less attractive? Because they are more masculine and they probably make them feel like a wanted and desired woman. I’ll bet you usually treat the women you date no different than your women friends. You put the same importance on them. The woman you are dating should be made to feel like she is more important than all other women in your life, not just one of many or one of the guys or whatever. If you don’t make a woman feel special, then why should she want to see you?
You are not ready to be in a relationship. You need to have something for yourself before you can share your life with another. Like a career, a starting point in your life, a plan. When you enter into a relationship you have to ask, how does being with this person enrich my life? How do I enrich theirs? If it is not equally enriching to both people then one of them is not ready for a relationship. You cannot rely on someone to fulfill your life. You need to fulfill your own life first then you can have a life worth sharing with someone.
Also, the fact that you are friends with dozens more women then men shows your insecurity with yourself as a man. Men who surround themselves with women as friends are generally intimated by women and relationships and desire attention from women and feed their ego by the fawning, attention and understanding they get by being around more female friends. It feeds your ego and you feed off the emotional support you get from them. Men who surround themselves with women feel that they will learn more about women, understand them and hopefully a relationship will fall in their lap. Well, women want to be with manly men, not a man who is considered one of the girls at the office.
I think if you look back and take an honest OBJECTIVE view of yourself now and over the years…you’ll see I’m right. But my guess is that your instinct is to do what women do, read this, get upset and have all your girlfriends read it to give you advice and judge the person who wrote it in order to feed your ego and make you feel better about yourself by having your friends…women friends tell you that none of it’s true, like I don’t know what I’m talking about or I’m just a bitch…No…I’m probably one of the only people you know who is brutally honest.
So…I really am not intending to hurt your feelings here but I have been subtly letting you know how I feel about things and you just don’t seem to get it. That tells me that you are someone who doesn’t pick up on clues or suggestions but needs to be outright made aware of things. So I am making you aware. If you are going to be successful in a relationship you need to man up, take responsibility for your life, make things happen for yourself and not meander through life living off your parents or anyone else and you need to stop being so darn clingy, needy and insecure.
So…again, I know that was brutal but I really am not trying to be rude, just very, very, honest which it seems people are not brutally honest with you and I figured you could use it. Maybe it will give you the kick in the butt you need to do the things you want in life or be the man you want to be. I don’t know…but I don’t believe in dancing around the truth.
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